One Time Its Actually Good To Be Negative

This morning I tried calling the clinic to see how my results were. Waiting for them really sucked. Even though I managed to block most of the ‘what if’s, it still played around in my mind more than I wanted it to.

Due to the incompetency of the clinic, they actually had to call me 5 times! Each call was a different person not knowing exactly what I wanted. In a voice message, I heard the Doctor that screwed me over the last time say “Your allergen test results aren’t back yet. The results for your.. er.. other test came back negative”. That was really a relief, but short lived. Lately I have been extra stressed...

Wil thought that it was due to the fight I had with my best friend, The Goat. The outcome of which is that I can no longer refer to him as The Goat, thus he will from now on be referred to as The Friend Formerly Known As The Goat.

The Friend Formerly Known As The Goat was lead to believe that it was also to do with the fact that I need more attention. I have admittedly told him that I do miss it sometimes but, doing things alone sometimes can be so liberating.

My Sister believes it has to do with my current poverty, my father & the crap he is giving me. Honestly, ask to borrow a couple hundred to fix my pc & he instead gives me a thousand and a whole lot of bitching to go with it. Besides my pc, the medical tests, the broken mirror, the many nice dinners & the usual bills (mostly alcohol related) also demanded money.

The bosses and KiKi think it has to do with my ‘might as well take a telephone pole up the ass’ projects with tight deadlines. One boss asked me how many more packs of fags I am smoking. KiKi, bless her soul bought some kerepek (chilli, sugar & oil soaked tapioca-chips) to share. But that really didn’t help things.

That’s because I’m working hard at reducing my fat content & increasing my protein. The results so far have been encouraging but I still have miles to go! Still the lack of sugar is making me cranky. I hate being allergic to sugar.

I guess I haven’t bitched about every single thing that’s stressing me to any one particular person. I do manage to de-stress well at the gym most of the time. But yesterday I felt like another way of de-stressing. I wanted a shag. A good shag mind you. Unlike the many yawn-inducing One Night Stands I had in the past. So I thought of Buzz and our amazing ability to have good sex no matter how fucked up the situation. Fit inducing deadlines, family emergencies, fights, whatever, did not stop the mind blowing shagging.

But I didn’t manage to get thru to his phone & had to handle the urge myself. All in all, it isn’t that bad. I could be worst off like Jups who got hit by a dumb fuck taxi driver. My new mantra is ‘just one more week & I’ll be in Bangkok!’

only see it on tv
read it in the magazines
celebrities that want sympathy

all they do is piss and moan
inside the rolling stone
talking about how hard life can be

Lifestlyes of the rich and the famous
theyre always complainin
always complainin
if money is such a problem
well they got mansions
think we should rob them

AJ & Good Charlotte~ Lifestyles Of The Rich & Famous