The AGM Of Alcohol Researchers

By the way I’ll be super busy with work this month so, *sorry* if I haven’t/don't comment on your blog!

While most scientists meet to solve world famine or find the cure for cancer, on Saturday I met up 4 of my fellow biotechnologists to decipher the illusion that is love. That and get drunk.

HELL NO! This isn’t going to be some whiney post about how love sucks & we are all ultimately setting ourselves up for heart break. Rather over a bottle of vodka & then some, a bunch of girls sat around bitching about what has & hasn’t been happening in our lives. We’ve all pretty much been in screwed up relationships but refused to talk about them directly.

The one member of the congress who kept quiet was Pinks, well simply because she was happily attached. She has been seeing this guy for the last year or so but never did introduce him to me, which seemed awkward, especially considering I was her best friend.

Of course alcohol loosened lips & she gave me enough clues to figure out it was an ex-colleague of ours which I had incessantly hated. I didn’t really hate him because of his personality or anything, but simply because I hated everyone in that horrible hell pit of a company.

Seeing how she confessed, I had to reassure her that I really didn’t hate her boyfriend all that much. Really! It was just an idol pastime. I then took the opportunity to disclose my sexuality to her.

“Hey Pinks, I have to tell you something important. I am gay.”

“Really? Joking la you!”

“No seriously, I like men!”

“Don’t bluff!”

“REAAALLY!! I am attracted to err.. men…”

“We’ll have to talk about this later….”

Of course we never did. It was too awkward for the both of us. Like reading a blog, you would think you knew everything about a person, but you don’t. Yours truly in particular does not reveal all my layers to anyone. Like peeling an onion, some of them make people cry…

With the pink elephant in the room set aside for another day, we adjourned to the after party. The service apartment was so posh that it had its very own resident hoity-toity penguins. Although most Jackass Penguins live off the coast of Africa, these ambassadors to Malaysia had their own private air conditioned room by the pool...

Sure its a bit dirty, but room service hadn't come around yet!

Ignoring the birds in bad tuxedoes, we continued topping up our glasses, which lead to more soul scouring banter.

“Isn’t it odd to see how all of us have changed over the years? We have known each other for five years now and we have all taken different paths!”

“Yet we are still the same! We are all still rebelling in our own little ways, yet we do things to conform!”

“Well things have changed, we all had to take measures to conform & become more acceptable. But I refuse to let go of my ideals & beliefs. With time gnawing away at our youth, we have to exercise, diet & do what ever else we can do to keep up our outer appearances.”

“Its like one week I stick to my soup diet & the next I binge on the most fattening foods & then feel bad about it!”

“Oh my God, you too? Being attractive takes so much more effort… And we still get screwed over by men!”

“Why is it good men are so hard to find? And even when we do find them, sooner or later something horrible pops up and we are screwed again & again?”

Sensing this may take a turn for the worst & become some bitching festival I interjected with “Oh we aren’t that bad. How about those girls who go chasing bad boys with the delusional hopes of changing them?”

“That’s like the ideal drama outcome! We better be thankful we aren’t like that!”

*Silence*

And that made me think. Although it’s something that I try to avoid, I feared that my unrealistic standards & snobbish behavior will lead me to a lonely life full of cats. I hate cats.

Fortunately by the grace of divine intervention on Sunday, I met him amongst the prawns, my LaLa Boy. LaLa being the Chinese name for a small tasty clam with juicy white flesh. Just when I was about to surrender my bodice for the rendering of other sluts, we met & he enthralled me. This is no easy feat I assure you, as even though I am a self declared slut, I’m a jaded self declared slut. I don’t know where this is heading, but I’ll be damned if it doesn’t make me happy that I can still feel...

Put on my blue suede shoes
And I boarded the plane
Touched down in the land of the Delta Blues
In the middle of the pouring rain
W.C. Handy -- won't you look down over me
Yeah I got a first class ticket
But I'm as blue as a boy can be

Then I'm walking in Memphis
Walking with my feet ten feet off of Beale
Walking in Memphis
But do I really feel the way I feel

Saw the ghost of Elvis
On Union Avenue
Followed him up to the gates of Graceland
Then I watched him walk right through
Now security they did not see him
They just hovered 'round his tomb
But there's a pretty little thing
Waiting for the King
Down in the Jungle Room

Androjane ft Bruce Springsteen~ Walking In Memphis