Disconnection/ Reconnection

Just the other day I met up my old pal, Ling Ling. For several months we had made many plans to catch up but just never did. Like all friends who do not manage to keep in contact, we came to a silence . It wasn’t awkward as much as it was guilt ridden. She asked me, “so what ever happened to your blog, I haven’t seen any new posts for a while?”

Its been more than 2 years since I decided to stop blogging. But I wasn’t going to call her out on that. I’m not even very sure where she currently goes for her yoga classes, though in my defence I think it’s near where I stay. I calmly replied, “I stopped actually. I decided I should be less self obsessed, its all rather tiring really...”

Truth be told, I actually stopped because I am self-obsessed. Blogging was taking time away from other more important activities, like partying, working out at the gym, meeting men & watching TV. Especially watching TV. It was becoming a chore, not a pleasure.

Now I feel the desire to craft the’ written word ’ coming back. Somewhere to record my life in a manner befitting (sending my deepest darkest thoughts into cyberspace is totally without consequence!). Something to which I can lay claim (So what if it is an anonymous blog). Some place to showcase my creativity.

Isn’t there a children’s book writing diva dying to burst out in all of us?

“Write your life autobiography before fame clouds your already stormy head,” she said.

Its been 2 years & 3 months. Plenty has changed and just as much has stayed the same.
About 3 years ago I met Mr. 99.8%. We’ve been a couple for more than 2 years now. This is the one. I have never been as sure that I found the right guy in my entire life.

Shortly after that, Slutboy got a job in Singapore. Cupcake decided to pursue his studies in France (or that’s what my brain tells me). Cupcake is now in Singapore with Slutboy where they had to find 15 other men just to replace me. Not really sure that is working though, I have big shoes...

About 2 years ago I changed jobs and now work in a sizeable advertising firm. I am now paid a measurable, however tiny fraction of my worth. Money, it means a lot to the greedy.

More than a year ago, my sister passed away. I never realised how much she meant to me, until it was too late to let her know. Even if I didn’t know to say it, I am glad I always took the time to show her how much she meant to me. Once the shock and not stop crying passed, there were several months of depression with only daily crying. Sometimes when faced with situations where I think about her, tears do escape, however I mostly have my emotions back in control.

Roughly three months ago, on the 2nd anniversary of the day we decide to be a commit to each other, Mr. 99.8% & I exchanged ‘engagement rings’. I will not go into technicalities & terminologies of how can gay men get engaged in Malaysia but it’s a symbol of our commitment to each other.

Recently I did Lasik surgery and now do not rely on contact lenses or spectacles. Instead, eye drops are now by best friend because of the dryness. But it’s worth it. I have rediscovered the joys of waking up, looking out the window and seeing airplanes!

So, in a nutshell, that’s what I’ve been up to since then. Don’t blame me for leaving the first time around but I had to. And so this epic journey blog continues.

I did my best to notice
When the call came down the line
Up to the platform of surrender
I was brought but I was kind

And sometimes I get nervous
When I see an open door
Close your eyes, clear your heart
Cut the cord

Are we human or are we dancer?
My sign is vital, my hands are cold
And I'm on my knees looking for the answer
Are we human or are we dancer?

Pay my respects to grace and virtue
Send my condolences to good
Give my regards to soul and romance
They always did the best they could

And so long to devotion
You taught me everything I know
Wave goodbye, wish me well
You've gotta let me go

Are we human or are we dancer?
My sign is vital, my hands are cold
And I'm on my knees looking for the answer
Are we human or are we dancer?

Will your system be alright
When you dream of home tonight?
There is no message we're receiving
Let me know, is your heart still beating?

Are we human or are we dancer?
My sign is vital, my hands are cold
And I'm on my knees looking for the answer

You've gotta let me know
Are we human or are we dancer?
My sign is vital, my hands are cold
And I'm on my knees looking for the answer
Are we human or are we dancer?

Are we human or are we dancer?
Are we human or are we dancer?

Human~ Killers

Trekking treasure down

Imagine you're having mind blowing sex. And you are about to cum. And out of no where, along comes this old skinny hostile & hysterical lesbian who cuts off your dick. You do not cum. You feel pain. You lose the moment. You lose your dick.

That's how it feels each time you come along and invade my space when I am happily tripping in my own world. That's how it feels every time it feels like when I and the profound displeasure of meeting you at a rave. Any rave, every time. Any event, any location. I don't care what your intention may be, respect my intentions of having a good time.


As civilized as I appear. As calm and collected I am when you're near, I rather you be far away from me. I rather be with the people I want to be with. Not stuck down at the bottom of a lightless shaft suffocating on the dark morbid fumes that is your black aura. You're persona non grata. You're uninvited. You're not wanted here.


And if, how minute the possibility that it may be, if it so happens that you just happen to wonder to the same spot, or want the same space, or want to just hang with my friends, just do me a favor and just don't. And it that doesn't sit well with your over inflated self serving ego, inform me of your intention, and I may actually give up my place in the universe for a better, more pristine, more chaste location.


Yes I rather be away from the comfort of my friends to be rid of the foul noxious stench is that is your trademark.


Sure during the time together, there were some good memories & plenty of fantastic songs that were playing. But all the memories were tainted the day you broke up with me over msn messenger. I clearly recall telling right at the start. That one of the most unforgivable acts when ending to me is not having the guts to tell me it is over to my face. I think its a common courtesy that should be extended to any one that you share a relationship with. You knew I would hate you for it, yet you went ahead and did it. For whatever the shortcomings of yours that I put up with, none of them compared to being dumped over the internet.


So no matter how sweet the memories were, they tasted like a perfect white wine with spit in it. No matter how fantastic, how uplifting, how seductive the songs were, they were all tainted with your mal intent & blatant disregard for my emotions & my being.


"Stranded in paradise, lost without you?" Fuck paradise, anywhere is better when I'm without you...


"Its a little bit lonely down here... Its a little bit faint without you near?" Like hell it is. I found new people to hang with up there with.


Can't you tell? Its not that I've decided that its better be be alone, I have decided its better to be far away from you. For all the times I was all sorts of crazy, for all the times I drove both you and myself mad, nothing compares to the stoic insanity that is my relentless pursuit to better. Better simply equals me with total disregard of you. The rest of my plan is not your concern.


So what if I remember or know a song? A song is just a bloody song. Just like all the other bloody songs I've herd over the years, they can only affect me the way I let them affect me. I don't want to be affected by any association to you. That is my business. What was once ours' is now mine. What was once shared and enjoyed together is now irrelevant of your participation. I don't care for your participation. In fact I applaud your exclusion from any activity that involves me. Or didn't anyone care to mention it to you?


Do you really want to know if I am still mad at you? Do you not realize that whatever warm fuzzy centre that is at my core, I don't care to exchange any words with you. Civil or otherwise. I do not subscribe to your channel. I do not want to buy any of your bullshit. I'm fine, thank you (but I will be fucking fantastic if I didn't have to see your face).


Don't make me have to say 'fuck off' to you in front of everybody. Don't make me have to fork out more money to buy you a clue.


I want you to leave me alone.


Fuck someone else's mind.


The next time I will ask you to go away.


And if you don't, don't blame me for disregarding my happiness, for I will let my over emotional self take over and free the beast within. Be warned, I have stopped being concerned about your wellbeing. I will fucking beat the shit out of you. There is a first & last time for everything.


I don't care for any association with you.

Drive boy dog boy
Dirty numb angel boy
In the doorway boy
She was a-lipstick boy
She was a-beautiful boy
And tears boy
And all in your inner space boy
You had hands girls boy
And steel boy
You had chemicals boy
I've grown so close to you boy
And you just groan boy
She said come over come over
She smiled at you boy

Drive boy dog boy
Dirty numb angel boy
In the doorway boy
She was a-lipstick boy
She was a-beautiful boy
And tears boy
And all in your inner space boy
You had hands girls boy
And steel boy
You had chemicals boy
I've grown so close to you boy
And you just groan boy
She said come over come over
She smiled at you boy

Let your feelings slip boy
But never your mask boy
Random blonde boy
High density random
blonde boy
Blonde country
Blonde high density
You are my drug boy
You're real boy
Dog dirty dumb cracking boy
You're getting wet boy
Big big time boy
Acid bears boy
Babes and babes
And babes and babes
and babes
And remembering nothing boy
Do you like my tin horn boy
It gets wet like at Angel
derailed

You got a velvet mouth
You're so succelent and beautiful
Shimmering and dirty
Wonderful and hot time
On your telephone line
And God and everything
On your telephone
And in walks an angel

Look at me mum
Squatting pissed in the tube hole
At Tottenham Court Road
I just come out of the Ship
Talking to the most blonde
I ever met
Shouting lager lager lager lager
Shouting lager lager lager lager
Shouting lager lager lager lager
Shouting lager lager lager
Shouting mega mega
White thing
Mega mega white thing
Mega mega white thing
Mega mega
Shouting lager lager lager lager
Mega mega white thing
Mega mega white thing
So many things to see and do
in the tube hole
The blonde going back
to Romford
Mega mega mega going back
to Romford
Hi mum are you having fun
On your way
To a new age tension headache

Born Slippy~ Underground (OST Trainspotting)

My Blog is like… A Box Of iJuice

Life’s funny like that. You think you know yourself & you go online and distill your memoirs into an oddly colorful collection of short snippets…

You chop your life into chunks, throw them into the thought blender & extract the sugary hype that is juice, discarding the pips, peel, fiber & what ever other substance is left over from the process.

You list your favorite lyrics/songs, cartoons, videos, actors, books, DJs, pictures, dishes, cocktails, hangouts, recipes, anecdotes & even talk about your friend’s encounter in the gym showers. Gee Golly Wow!

Sex is splashed all over the pages freely as the usage of profanities like fuck, bitch, slut & cock. But the profanities don’t nearly do as much damage to the English language as tainting it with words like anti-achievement, serial monogamist, cockadile, sexcapades & goatilicious. Goat-delicious. Goats aren’t just delicious, goats are everywhere, especially in my blog!

What is a blog without a lil moan & whine?

Relate the bad days at the office, bitch about the bitch, tales of the death of a loved one or even an argument that seems utter meaningless. Stories of love found & love lost, just like the movies keeps the ‘airplay’ up.

Sentimental stories about those who count fruit flies & girls named after cherry blossoms gives you the appearance of a legitimate writer. Meh… I was paid to write & hated it with a vengeance.

Name drop a couple of celebrities for glamour, several clubs so everyone who has ever been out clubbing wonders if you were there & secret locations for nosey pokers to check out. Mystery & mystique intrigue are key sellers when selling on the internet!

Talking about fitness instructors like a drooling stalker or post secretly snapped photos of cute but unsuspecting strangers on holiday always inspire snippy comments. Not forgetting the explicit, even if not lucid depiction of men you lust over even if the act itself is shallower than a mirage?

Top it all off with bits and pieces of your own skin to seem more attractive to the perverts, which most likely make up a high percentage of all internet users. Heh.


Then like the acrid taste of your own vomit after one drink too many, you wonder if cyber space is not as harmlessly/ anonymously fun as you initially thought. What if others can identify this queen by his perky man-boobs? What if the sociological experiment in vivid color has finally turned a thousand shades of grey, each as awe inspiring as the next?

Not so suddenly your creativity is governed by what your friends’ emotions. You can’t talk about a bad day without someone thinking you’re suicidal. There isn’t a conversation that the damn blog doesn’t sooner or later take centre stage & push the real man out of the spot light. And to top it all off, anonymous sex posts are no longer anonymous.

Who did you sleep with Androjane?

Some where along the way I’ve learnt to deal with being dark and twisty inside. I’ve even learnt to let go, even if begrudgingly of ill harbored sentiments towards those who slanderously call me malicious names to my face and to those who irk, I just smirk. I’ve forgiven a guy who slapped me, within reason. But it doesn’t matter.

My creative freedom is shrouded with fear & doubt.

Fear that those who are quick to judge will think I’m a total nutcase, my mind confirmed infirmed with all the substance abuse. Trust me, being different can be awfully tiring & horridly lonely. I can be surrounded by a sea of familiar faces and still feel like a lone pine, in a desert… wilting away.. needle by needle.

And I doubt my own ability to inspire. That’s right, I’ve always had aspirations to be your inspiration, but I’m not sure if you ever got my drift. I wanted whoever who damn well wanted to read my shit to at least try to think for themselves. Think outside of the box…

Think inside the box…

Think whiles fucking doggy style on top the damned box.

Conscious independent thought is so much more precious than *OH MY GAWD* knowing that black is the new pink or that Pink likes to wear black. Thinking is HOOoot!

Did I have to spell it out for you?

Society’s norms are for the sheep. Sheep that are sheared for their wool & slaughtered for their meat. Sheep that are herded by their master’s bitches as the masters snooze beneath the broken oak tree. The shepherd can fucking knit his own pubes & eat himself. I want to be free.

Free of the burden of justification & the conscience that prevents me from revealing all the sordid details of my escapades that involve others’ lives. I’m fucking tired of keeping all your damn secrets! Shit happens and sometimes it’s my life too, don’t you get it?

We all fall of the wagon, through the barbed wire fence & into the ever so carefully placed vats of toxic waste once in a while. We all need a little tenderness to assure us we can be loved. We all crave attention when nothing seems right. But my dears, acceptance from others is so over rated when you can’t even love yourself. Give yourself a hug now, or, better yet a good wank.

The freedom to write as I please smells sweater than the cinnamony scent of freshly baked apple pie. I can almost taste the gooey, chewy warm super sweet goodness that is creative freedom. Find another fucking muse to copy. And if you can’t, in sure guess/guest bloggers can do an equally as squalid job. The human brain isn’t just good for multiplying mad cow prions, you know. Or do you?

My dearest darling readers, I love you all, even those that I wouldn’t sleep with for 99,999 dollars. I especially thank you for reading this super long post.

But the thing is, if the neurons haven’t sparked in your mind, if you can’t put two and two together to get a foursome, I’m tired of censoring my words & won’t be your queen bitch anymore. I have plenty of other equally as conquerable if not as worthy things to rule over. Shut your mouth and don’t go comparing me to all the other gay blogs that have become defunct. Androjane has always been more than rainbows & pink triangles, there is plenty of fluff and sparkles too.

Maybe I’ll continue to post lyrics but really, what happens next is anyone’s guess. Its time for Androjane to sleep. Don’t think of this ‘me’ as dead, just floating…

Matta atode… Ja ne…

I don't mind...
Suddenly, you came to life
You were, astounding
I was so mesmerized

Heavenly, is all that, I could feel
Now your here
And left without a single feel
From this day on...

I'll never be the same again
I'll never be the same again
I'll never be able to live, my life
I'll never be the same again
I'll never be able to live my life
Since you came along

Heavenly, is all that, I could feel
Now your here, there's nothing left, for me to feel
From this day on...

I'll never be the same again, I'll never be able to live my life...
I'll never be the same again, I'll never be able to live my life...
From this day on

How could I ever get over you?
How could I ever get over you?
How could I...
Since you came along
How could I ever get over you...

Markus Schulz ft. Carrie Skipper - Never Be The Same

Pox No More, Day 16: Stressed Out Blanket Hugging Freak

I’ve been back at work two days! Just two days and already its like I never left. Well besides the constant badgering of chicken pox jokes!

Like my goat friend would say, BAA!

This evening my sister caught me all bundled up in my blanket on the couch watching Boston Legal…

Sister~ Is something wrong?

AJ~ YES! My whole life is wrong! My clients told me to stay away. My colleagues tease me horrendously! My egg sandwiches weren’t as salty as I would liked and my parents didn’t love me enough when I was 26. Wooooooan! Woooooooaaaaaan!!

Sister~…

Okay maybe I never gave my parents a chance to look into my soul & maybe I could have spent more time tackling the real issues instead of passing off snide remarks.

OR Maybe I shouldn’t have shocked my sister. But I really just wanted to be left alone to watch TV.

I wanna talk to you
The last time we talked Mr. Smith you reduced me to tears
I promise you it wont happen again
Do I attract you?
Do I repulse you with my queasy smile?
Am I too dirty?
Am I too flirty?
Do I like what you like?

I could be wholesome
I could be loathsome
guess I'm a little bit shy
Why don't you like me?
Why don't you like me without making me try?

I try to be like Grace Kelly
But all her looks were too sad
So I try a little Freddie, mmm
I've gone identity mad!

I could be brown
I could be blue
I could be violet sky
I could be hurtful
I could be purple
I could be anything you like
Gotta be green
Gotta be mean
Gotta be everything more
Why don't you like me?
Why don't you like me?
Why don't you walk out the door!
Getting angry doesn't solve anything

How can I help it
How can I help it
How can I help what you think?
Hello my baby
Hello my baby
Putting my life on the brink
Why don't you like me
Why don't you like me
Why don't you like yourself?
Should I bend over?
Should I look older just to be put on your shelf?

I try to be like Grace Kelly
But all her looks were too sad
So I try a little Freddie mmm
I've gone identity mad!

I could be brown
I could be blue
I could be violet sky
I could be hurtful
I could be purple
I could be anything you like
Gotta be green
Gotta be mean
Gotta be everything more
Why don't you like me?
Why don't you like me?
walk out the door!

Say what you want to satisfy yourself
But you only want what everybody else says you should want
you want

I could be brown
I could be blue
I could be violet sky
I could be hurtful
I could be purple
I could be anything you like
Gotta be green
Gotta be mean
Gotta be everything more
Why don't you like me?
Why don't you like me?
walk out the door!

I could be brown
I could be blue
I could be violet sky
I could be hurtful
I could be purple
I could be anything you like
Gotta be green
Gotta be mean
Gotta be everything more
Why don't you like me?
Why don't you like me?
walk out the door!
uuuuuua
Humphry were leaving
kerchinga!

Mika ~ Grace Kelly

A Pox On Me, Day 10: Crying… Dying… It Rhymes!

Some gay men can be so serious!

Gay Rights For Gays!

Gay Sales At Prada!

No Ugly People Allowed!

But its important not to lose sight of the important things, like having fun! I like to have fun! Planet Unicorn is fun! There are very few things gayer than gay unicorns.




Let’s Cuddle!



I’m Hot!



I’m Wet!

In the year 2117,
an 8 year old gay boy named Shanon found a magic lamp.
He was granted 3 wishes.
The first a fur jacket,
the second a flying car
& the third was a planet full of unicorns.
This is the story of that planet.

A gay boy wished for a planet full of unicorns,
planet unicorn,
unicorn planet…

Give it up for feathers,
Ooooo Cadillac,
And Tom Cruise
Oooo… PLANET UNICORN HEY

The Planet Unicorn Theme Song

A Pox On Me, Day 7: Best Friends Forever, or at least until dinner is over…

The wonderful thing about friendship is that its convenient. Forget all that fluff about how your friends will be there to share your joy, sorrow & truest moments. There are people who seriously thrive on drama & there also those who want a piece of your success. A true test of friendship is when you want someone to be random with!

That’s right! When you want to have a burger at 2am in the morning, when you feel like drunken stargazing, when you feel like poking fun at friends selling love spells in the flea market or when you can’t stand staying at home with chicken pox & just need to get out, that’s when you can count on a true friend.

The best story of randomness I’ve heard recently is from my cousin who went to Genting Highlands (a mountain top casino resort) just to brush her teeth with her friends. They packed their tooth brushes, drove for 2 hours & located one of those lovely fountains where they did dutifully up kept their oral hygiene.

Times like this I miss my goatyest friend. He maybe an evil antagonistic squeaky voiced slab of tough mutton, but we still do some of the most whimsical stuff together. Awkwardness may be an issue but hey, isn’t it always? Nowadays it can feel like we’re strangers, but deep down we know its very comfortable.

Its' been a long time since I've seen your face
But I want you to know, no one ever took your place
And the dream is here but I don't know where
I'm runnin' around, no time to spare

Hey you look like me but you talk like a stranger
It's all goin' deep, deeper than a razor
Closer, out of control
Comin' from a deeper love

It's been a long time since I felt I know you
And all of my words, they just seem too wrong, to you
You're killin' my dream but I don't know why
I'm runnin' around, no time to die

Hey you look like me but you talk like a stranger
It's all goin' deep, deeper than a razor
Closer, out of control
My hearts goin' deeper now

It's been a long trip and I'm willin' to show you
Hey that life it can change, but I'll always know you
You're holdin' the key to the other side
And believe if I was risen, the eyes of a child

mmmm...
Hey you look like me but you talk like a stranger
It's all goin' deep, deeper than a razor
Closer, out of control

Hey you look like me but you talk like a stranger
It's all goin' deep, deeper than a razor
Closer, out of control
My hearts goin' deeper now

Deepsky ft Jes Brieden~ Talk Like Strangers

A Pox On Me, Day 3: Big Shouldered Roll…

Besides continuing with season 2 of Joey, today I decided to dedicate time to cleaning up my blog roll. I didn’t really want to do it partly because of the work involved but mostly because it meant it meant having to remove many dead links which were once represented dear friends. My almost 2 years of blogging have accumulated a fairly long list blogs and I’ve gotten to know interesting lives…

I’ve tried to comment wherever I could still relate to the subject matter but some bloggers have me totally stumped. Everyone’s life journey is different and so much is happening out there. I don’t even know where to begin…

What would you do if you were offered to endorse a product which plain logic would tell you doesn’t work?

How would you deal with the death of a long suffering loved one?

When faced with a poisoned paradise, do you ignore the dangers and just enjoy the beauty or run in fear?

Who do you turn to when you no idea to deal with your problems?

Which is more difficult to find in Singapore, vegetarian food or a decent man?

Where there is smoke, are there always sexy firemen?

When I first started reading blogs, I was inspired. Inspired by the diversity of lives. Enthralled by the play on words. Mesmerized by the language. Charmed by the little/big details men & women were willing to launch into the great unknown that is cyberspace.

“Some of these people can really damn well write,” I thought to myself.

A quick peak into the TV Guide section of the newspapers not so long ago confirmed this for me. “The Datin Diaries” read the bold print. I wonder if the dear Datin ever saw any of the royalties, or, if she even wants them.

To borrow from one of the blogs I can’t bear to remove, but enough about you…

I’ve been meaning to talk about the latest revelation in my life but I haven’t been able to find the fancy words to make it sound grand enough. Maybe it isn’t all that grand after all. Maybe it will sound better simple and straight forward.

I am clueless about what I want from life.

Don’t worry, there isn’t going to be a long whine to follow it, but I just thought it would feel better to get it out there & join the thousands if not millions of people out there who still haven’t a clue.

Spend all your time waiting
For that second chance
For a break that would make it okay
There’s always one reason
To feel not good enough
And it’s hard at the end of the day
I need some distraction
Oh beautiful release
Memory seeps from my veins
Let me be empty
And weightless and maybe
I’ll find some peace tonight

In the arms of an angel
Fly away from here
From this dark cold hotel room
And the endlessness that you fear
You are pulled from the wreckage
Of your silent reverie
You’re in the arms of the angel
May you find some comfort there

Sarah McLachlan~ Angel

A Pox On Me, Day 2: Still Not Bored…

Its day two of the Pox and my mind has begun to wonder. I recall something from all the genetics textbooks/ trashy vampire novels I read. Something about small pox, a horrible disease similar to chicken pox which killed millions of people in the darker ages. Thanks to the technology of vaccination, we don’t have to worry about small pox, just fucking chicken pox & about a million other diseases which were previously unnamed.

And so I read up on the damn disease & the statistics look cheery! Only 80% of chicken pox related deaths involve adults! And most adults experience very little scaring, simply because they are old (and vain) enough not to scratch. I read this line to the child in my heart a million times hoping he would stop pick away at my blister riddled scalp, but he quippily replied “Its not like your ever gonna shave your fucking head!”

Well I’d like to keep my options open! What if one day I wanna do the mardi gras parade or sHalloween as Slutboy?

The first season of Joey was entertaining enough. It seemed a good enough plot to place a New Yorker in the heart of Los Angeles. And surround him with weird characters. But very often I felt, damn I wish I could live in that apartment! No seriously. Something about the setting. But a house isn’t a home without the hearts of those you love…

Stranger than fiction was a pretty good movie. Sure the men weren’t like super hot or remotely close, but it sure did feel real, real enough. The ironic twist at the end was good, but not great. A feel good movie at its best, though somehow, I think kids should only be allowed to ride bikes in parks under close supervision, away from people who don’t want to die.

Pan’s Labyrinth was really good. Best movie of the year so far. Far better that the well disguised plot of the capitalist struggle to control oil that is Spiderman 3 (Venom being Iraq, Mary Jane being all that is good & guess who is Spiderman, I cant take credit for this conspiracy theory though). All the characters were well played & the effects amazing. And if anything, the Spanish language added a certain flair to the plot. Who said that there are no new stories to tell?

I think I did say that sometime back. I was misguided. But still, at the back of my heart, like the lingering desire to be a hopeless romantic & irresponsible fool, I like to think there is truth in the fact that the human imagination is limitless…

Hey
J-J-J-Jaded
In all its misery it will always be what I love and hated
And maybe take a ride to the other side we're thinkin' of
We'll slip into the velvet glove
And be Jaded
Yeah, I'm so Jaded
And baby I'm afraid of you
You're thinkin' so complicated
I've had it all up to here
But it's so overrated
Love and hate it
Wouldn't trade it
Love Me Jaded

Aerosmith~ Jaded

Contagious Affection

I’ve fucking got chicken pox. Its not fucking funny when you’re vain but too itchy not to do anything about it. Its like either itch to death or deal with scarring! Not to mention the annoyance of some of the unmentionable places where spots have appeared! Fuckity FUCK FUCK! Fuuuuuuck!

And that’s the least of my worries.

Sure the 2 weeks of medical leave may sound appealing to some, but not when I’ve just started work! Will I still have a job after my 2 weeks of hell is over? I wonder what the company will say once I get back… GAH!

Cry me a river
Cry me a river er er
cry me a river
cry me a river er er
ya ya!

Justin Timberlake~ Cry Me A River (Dirty Vegas Mix)

Mary: NAKL

This won't make much sense.

But once again, this is meant for me, not you.


I've been downhearted baby,
I've been down--I've been downhearted baby,
Ever since the day we met
Ever since the day we met
I've been downhearted baby,
I've been down--I've been downhearted baby,
Ever since the day we met
Ever since the day we met

Jan lays down and wrestles in her sleep
Moonlight spills on comic books
And superstars in magazines
An old friend calls and tells us where to meet
Her plane takes off from Baltimore
And touches down on Bourbon Street

We sit outside and argue all night long
About a god we've never seen
But never fails to side with me
Sunday comes and all the papers say
Ma Teresa's joined the mob
And happy with her full time job

Do do do do doo do...Do do do do doo do...
Do do do do doo do...Do do do do doo do...
Do do do do doo do...Do do do do doo do...
Do do do do doo do...Do do do do doo do...

I've been downhearted baby,
I've been down--I've been downhearted baby,
Ever since the day we met
Ever since the day we met
I've been downhearted baby,
I've been down--I've been downhearted baby,
Ever since the day we met
Ever since the day we met

Am I alive or thoughts that drift away?
Does summer come for everyone?
Can humans do as prophets say?
And if I die before I learn to speak
Can money pay for all the days I lived awake
But half asleep?

Do do do do doo do...Do do do do doo do...
Do do do do doo do...Do do do do doo do...

A life is time, they teach you growing up
The seconds ticking killed us all
A million years before the fall
You ride the waves and don't ask where they go
You swim like lions through the crest
And bathe yourself on zebra flesh

Do do do do doo do...Do do do do doo do...
Do do do do doo do...Do do do do doo do...
Do do do do doo do...Do do do do doo do...
Do do do do doo do...Do do do do doo do...

I've been downhearted baby,
I've been downhearted baby,
Ever since the day we met
Ever since the day we met

I've been downhearted baby,
I've been down--I've been downhearted baby,
Ever since the day we met
Ever since the day we met
I've been downhearted baby,
I've been down--I've been downhearted baby,
Ever since the day we met
Ever since the day we met
I've been downhearted baby,
I've been down--I've been downhearted baby,
Ever since the day we met
Ever since the day we met
I've been downhearted baby,
I've been down--I've been downhearted baby,
Ever since the day we met
Ever since the day we met
I've been downhearted baby,
I've been down--I've been downhearted baby,
Ever since the day we met
Ever since the day we met
I've been downhearted baby,
I've been down--I've been downhearted baby,
Ever since the day we met
Ever since the day we met
I've been downhearted baby,
I've been down--I've been downhearted baby,
Ever since the day we met
Ever since the day we met

Primative Radio Gods~ Standing Outside A Broken Phone Booth With Money In My Hands