Office PollyThickS

Ok, why was I so annoyed by this Polly Thick (Assed) person?

As I was leaving work about a week ago, she decided to start a conversation. Although it started out nice & proper, Polly decided to imply that I was bitching about her to the Kiki, our beloved graphic designer. The truth is that each time she talks down to Kiki with her condecending nasally sarong party girl tone, I have to sacrifice precious time to manage the situation. Regardless of what I said to Kiki, she has no right to accuse me like that, especially not when I'm on my way home. To minimize our dealings, I decided to apply a little standard protocol...

Here is the conversation I had with her via office messenger a few days later. Of course some of the situations have been changed but the bullshit remains the same...

Polly~ Kindly check mail for my prediction
(Prediction? Prediction? I didnt know we had a clairvoyant in the office...)

Androjane~ *Insert the most confounding 10 line sentance in the world*

Polly~ Whichever way you guys preferred, I'm alright. I checked my copy, my version is correct 11/5/06, maybe has been reformatted on yr display as 5/11/06. But can't go through twt you guys until have feedback.... (Pointless redundancy has been removed for your sanity but basically, she was blaming Excel for her incompetence)

Androjane~ *Insert super repetative 20 line sentance that repeats everything atleast twice*

Polly~ Cut the high flown English. it's annoying

Androjane ~I will try to lower my standards for your benefit, per request then. Now I have to get back to work. And just to remind you, we are awaiting the contents for the promotions, as well as the products to be included in the brochure.

Polly~ I've just sent out an email on promotion, pls check shortly. Brochure, written to supplier. Wait for them to revert. btw What's with you, are purposefully trying to scheme something..but I forgive you before hand before things get out of hand. (Scheming? She would know all about scheming. Atleast this time you uses before hand instead of her usual "prior hand")

Androjane~ Work is work, nothing personal, but after your last comment pertaining to why Kiki is frustrated working with the packaging, I realise it may be best to keep a professional distance, less I be accused of inciting discord between Kiki and you again. (Damn right bitch, you aren't laying your shit on me again!)

Polly~ No worries, that has not crossed my mind. So let's be normal from now on. Kiki has something going on in her mind & she has a fixed mindset of things so nothing can changed that. We'll work around that... (Work around Kiki? You must be sniffing glue! She is the only one that can use the damn graphic program for more that porn. I'm not even dignifying *that* with a reply!)

And from that day onwards, I singled out Polly & isolated her from any situation I can. I refuse to say good morning or even acknoledge her presence unless there is work to be done. Like the Boogeyman, Pontianak & The Monsters under the bed, I hope, by ignoring her, she will shrivel up & die. Well at least her tits.

I wanna push you around, well I will, well I will
I wanna push you down, well I will, well I will
I wanna take you for granted,

I wanna take you for granted, yeah I will, I will
Matchbox 20~ Push