Don't Ask

Ladies & Gentlemen,

AJ is back. It was a fabulous holiday but my sister had some horrible news that I doubt I can shake off any time soon.

When I was younger, I always wondered what made adults so screwed up. To me, they were always whining, crying, cursing, cheating, hurting each other emotionally, if not physically. As if being happy wasn’t enough.

I couldn’t help but wonder why some people stopped believing in love, stopped trusting other people and preferred to stay emotionally distant from the world.

As I grew older, I learnt more about selfish people can be. We are worst than animals. Despite never giving up hope, I then realized I’m too emotional for my own good. I then began to envy the people who were emotionally distant, could just block it all out & move on with life.

Tonight, I felt betrayed like never before. I felt like sinking deep into the bowels of the earth & never reemerging. Worst the promise was broken by my own blood. There is more than just blood relationships that make people trust each other. People stay close for all sorts of reasons. And there are even more reasons to go on with life.

Screw people who are so selfish they hurt the people closest to them.

Screw inconsiderate bastards.

Screw blood relations.

My life is my own & I have to move on. No one else will look out for my best interest. No one else is thinking about me. Besides myself, no one absolutely cares about me.

Meanwhile life goes on. There is work to get back to. There are dreams to achieve. There are better places to be. I won’t waste another moment considering people who won’t consider me.

And anyone who reads this, don’t bother asking. The problem is too personal. The problem is mine. For now, I need my space to properly plan my future.

We are all born into this world alone & that is how we will leave it. The sooner I learn never to trust anyone, the better.

I guess that time is here.