I'm Sorry but I Lost My Religion...

When you call my name it’s like a little prayer

I’m down on my knees, I wanna take you there

In the midnight hour I can feel your power

Just like a prayer you know I’ll take you there

I hear your voice, it’s like an angel sighing

I have no choice, I hear your voice

Feels like flying

I close my eyes, oh God I think I’m falling

Out of the sky, I close my eyes

Heaven help me..

Madonna~ Like a little prayer

(this song is really about giving blowjobs, not relavant at all )

I'm not a religious soul. I rarely pray & ussually stay clear of worship. My father is a taoist, mother is a catholic, several other religions have married into my extended family. But I remain steadfast in my choice. Before you go screaming "Die you Godless son-of-a bitch" and click away, hear me out. I have taken the time to learn about some religions. I have read the bible and I have read the quaran but I choose to life my life based on my own set of rules:

Its ok to do what ever I want as long as nobody gets hurt in the process. Somewhat idealistic as you never know how your actions may affect other. I.e. say you were to have wild animal sex in the back alley of a club & unintentionally the cum filled condom fell and could not be located in the dark. (is this why they invented glow in the dark rubbers?) You go back in to get another man and when you bring him out, he slips on the cummy condom and knocks his head. He has to go to the clinic and you of course no longer get your second orgasm. Which brings us to my next rule.

There is karma in this life. This ancient concept can be simply explained with a "what goes around comes around". If you plan to cause chaos in the cosmos, be prepared to deal with the shit swinging around and hitting you in the face. Same goes for good things. If you are willing to share something good with others, eventually it will come back to you. As a diabolical schemer, this is one of the hardest rules for me to follow. So what I do in general, is just balance all the evil I do with some good deeds... Eg. The other day when I did a good deed and sent my workmate to her car parked far away. But on the way there the road was blocked by this guy parked in the middle of the road. I waited patiently only to have this ditzy chick walk out and proceed to have a 2 minute conversation. Well, it could have lasted longer if I didn't shout "hello miss, this is not the playground, if you need to conduct your business do it somewhere else so I won't have the urge put you in a coma". So by telling her the importance of road safety I have earned two points of good to use up irritating someone else...

Tolerance. To some extent you need to tolerate all the idiots in the world. Every day is be kind to dumb animals day and you have to consider that they may not have the mental capacity to think for themselves. Example:

"Did you get a haircut?"

"No, you make me so sick that my hair has been falling out..."

There is a God, an omnipresent God. He is really busy trying to keep up with all the horrbile things happening in the world:- People being bombed, inocents dieing etc. So It figures to only pray and ask him to help on the really big things that you have no control over. Even if God isn't perfect, I wouldnt figure him as an egomaniac needing to be praised by the masses continually. I would rather concentrate on lessening his problems rather than telling him what he already knows, he is great.

My christian aunt at the nursery " Oh God, please bless me and help this man give me a discount on the the plant I am about to purchase." Go pray for a clue! God is too busy trying to feed the orphans in Africa to work on giving you a discount on a RM6 plant (USD1).

All religions are good. Its the people that are bad. Believe it or not, suicide bombers, child molesting priests, womanizing monks and human sacrificing gurus are really "bad people". They have managed to take something as pure and good as religion and twist it for their own gain. Fanatical Opportunists are everywhere! I would rather read a holy book rather than listen to a bunch of close friends say

"Why don't you join us in the christian faith?"
"Why should I?"

"Because err.. the fires of hell are really hot and they will hurt!"

"Yeah have you been burnt alive before?"

"Well if heaven is full of people like you, I rather take my chances with the devil"

In this free world (not really), where people are supposedly free to choose, free to decide, its disgusting to see religion seperate couples. Even worse when opportunists use religion as a way to create strife & pain. And with that I appologize for the long ranty rant about my friend and her cross religion relationship. That datin will get her just deserts one day. Just as will all the other mean people out there. What goes up must come down.