The 3 Date Rule & Other Useless Notions About Sex

Everybody wants sex but we can't all the time. Often, we are expected to wait atleast to the third date before we reach for the other guy's trouser snake & make it angry. Why? Because its not polite to exchange bodily fluids with someone, until you can guarantee you won't shout someone else's name. Billy, Bob or whatever...

No, seriously. There have been times where I've done the dirty with a guy on the first date but usually, its more to do with just needing to get off, rather than attraction or love. Men are sexual creatures & we have eyelids so we don't have to see what or who we are doing. And unless its really good, we will never go back for seconds or even remember names.

But if you really are into a guy, its really recommended to wait to the third date before you play with the joy stick. This does not mean you can't snog/ lick/ touch/ nibble/ tweek/ rub/ hold/ caresss/ stroke/ massage or simply play with any other part of the willing party. Just stay away from the willy! This is called cock teasing & is vital to hold a guys attention. The moment your hand slips down there, all the blood rushes away to the meatstick & away from the brain. Whatever witty conversation you may have been having becomes a series of Uh-yeah.... more... Lower oh I mean Lover...No... If you say so...

But if its an itch you are looking to scratch, I highly recommend the NO KISSING ON THE MOUTH CLAUSE.

Simply because if he kisses badly or has bad breath, you won't be able to get him to stop, without ending the whole thing. And even if you enjoy the kisses alot, chances are he has some horrible disease that he won't tell you about. SHAME ON YOU if you believe that "its just a ulcer".

Above all, always BE SAFE. Its not just money & magic beans that are at stake. Men will say anything to get into your pants, when blood rushes away from their brain. Even if you think you can trust your loverboy, don't be silly enough to trust whoever he has trusted. Because you never know who he may have trusted...

All that being said, there aren't any real rules about sex & you, like me, should get off your ass and go look for some loving -la....

Ohh boy you looking like you like what you see
Won't you come over check up on it,
I'm gone let you work up on it
Ladies let em check up on it,
watch it while he check up on it
Dip it, pop it,
work it, stop it,
check on me tonight
Dip it, pop it,
work it, stop it,
check on me tonight
I can tell you wanna taste it, but I'm gone make you chase it
You got to be patient,
I like my men patient
More patience,
you take might get you more places
You can't be abrasive,
has to know to pace it
If I let you get up on it,
you gotta make a promise
That you gone put it on me,
like no ones put it on me
Don't bore me,
just show me,
all men talk but don't please
I can be a tease,
but I really wanna please you

Beyonce ~ Check On It